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(Divorced) Home For the Holidays

In the months leading up to the holidays, I start getting calls from listeners looking for ways to deal with impending family dramas. What should be a joyous time of reunion can feel like a burden — especially with divorces and remarriages.

People often let their emotions about familial situations take over, instead of using logic to lay out how they handle stressful holiday gatherings. In today’s Deep Dive podcast, “(Divorced) Home For the Holidays,” I’m discussing where your priorities should lie — as a parent or step-parent — during this season. Keep these points handy to alleviate holiday stress when divorces are involved:

1. Have the courage to stay home from anywhere that makes you unhappy

2. Stop catering to the chaos created by extended family

3. Give up your tug-of-war with family members

The most important consideration for divorced parents?

The children.

The more effort you and your ex can put into making the holidays enjoyable — instead of tense, awkward, or bitter — the better off your kids will be. Listen to this episode for the pep talk I gave my caller, Jim, who was going to be spending the holidays with his cheating ex-wife and her family

Let me help you avoid making this holiday season more difficult

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📚 Don’t miss out on related topics

These Deep Dive episodes explore more of my advice about holiday drama and parenting while divorced:

1. Avoiding Shattered Holidays

2. The Dos and Don'ts of Divorce For Parents

Listen to the Call of the Day episode that inspired today’s Deep Dive:

My Mom Waited Because of You

Holidays shouldn’t be the only time of year when divorced parents prioritize their kids’ well-being. Read Lezly’s perspective on being raised with a mom who chose to be single for her children:

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My mom left my abusive, alcoholic father when I was in second grade and my twin brothers were four years old. She was a faithful Dr. Laura listener and never dated anyone while we were children.

After we all grew up and moved out, I sensed mom needed a companion.

I joked that she might meet a man if she went on a dating website, and boy did she. The man she met became like a real dad to me, and they have been married for 25 years now.

From the bottom of my heart, I thank you.

You influenced our mom to make us her priority until we were grown.

💡 Thought of the Day 

Now, go do the right thing!

Looking for even more Dr. Laura? Check out…

Marriage 101 | Make an Appointment | Merch | Family Premium Podcast